3 PHUKET: TIPS FOR VISITING PHUKET

Here under some tips for first time visitors to Phuket.

Ignoring the Red Flags on the Beach!

Swimming during monsoon (Late May to about August) is a serious matter, people drawn on a weekly basis and it’s not how you want to end your holidays. Rip currents are treacherous, and no matter how good you think you can swim, you will probably not win. Red flags mean NO SWIMMING. Yellow and red flags indicate that you can swim between the flags where lifeguards are on duty.

Not bargaining, or bargain too much!

Everyone knows that bargaining is part of the shopping experience in Thailand, but you don’t bargain everywhere. On the market, you may start at 60-70% of the demanded price and go as you feel comfortable. But don’t even consider bargaining at the convenience store or in a shopping mall! You should bargain for your bike rental, mainly if you rented it for several days, but not international car rent brands.

Do not underestimate the sun on day one!

The breeze is cool, and the sea is warm. Sea temperatures ranges between 28 to 30 degrees Celsius throughout the year. It’s so easy to get carried away and enjoy a sunny day, especially if you are escaping the cold winter of your country. But don’t be fooled, that sun is mean, and one thing is sure: if you get a severe sunburn on day one, it will ruin your potential suntan! So do wear a good sunscreen, it is easy to buy from everywhere, even 7-11!

Do not forget to take travel insurance if you plan to rent a motorbike

If you buy your plane ticket with your credit card you automatically qualify for the free basic travel insurance. You might think this is enough but it is rarely enough if you do need serious medical attention. Also if you are in a scooter accident and need to be taken to hospital and you dont have enough cover your passport will be confiscated until your medical expenses have been paid. Furthermore if you are in a scooter accident and you dont have a valid drivers license indicating you can drive a motor cycle and if you are not in possession of a International Drivers Permit (obtainable from any AA outlet in South Africa), YOUR MEDICAL TRAVEL INSURANCE WILL NOT PAY.

Travel insurance exists for a reason. Of course, it feels like wasted money, until you need it. If you plan to rent a car or a bike, I urge you to get decent travel insurance. Driving in Phuket is notoriously adventurous, and it’s often the inexperienced driver’s fault. If something happens, you want the best support you can get and fast. No doubt hiring a scooter is the best way to explore the island.  Make sure you have a valid licence, even though you probably wont be asked to produce one but there are often road blocks and they love stopping tourists. In a day you can easily go through three or four depending on where you travel.  You will be required to pay a spot fine so rather get a international bike licence back home. Another option is to hire a car with a driver for a day and they make great guides.

Please do not over pack

Thailand is hot all year round, no exception. The colder it gets here is probably 25 C, and that is exceptional, usually around December. So all you need to pack are tee shirts and short pants! And remember, shopping is part of the fun in Phuket so you probably will end up buying more than you expect, so keep your packing to the minimum. Everything you need can be found here, often cheaper than home! Laundry places are available on every corner and it is cheap. 80 Baht for a dry weight kilogram. Give in the morning and collect the afternoon (Perfectly packed in a vacuum pack that you dont even need ironing). You really really do not have to pack in 30 shirts and 4 pants if you are here for a week or two. Trust me, Phuket is no Milan Fashion Runway. 

Do not go to the same beach every day

 Many first timers just stay in the area where there hotel is located. Please keep in mind that there are 36 beaches in Phuket and the most beautiful ones are a bit further. Rent a bike or a car and explore! You have traveled thousand of kilometers so make the most of your time on this beautiful island. Read all about the best beaches in my post on Phuket's beaches.

Avoid visiting Phuket in High Season

If you avoid going between November and February you will experience more in a leisure-able way, queues will be far shorter, you will have a more personal experience and everything wont feel as commercialised.  You are on holiday after all and don’t want to feel like you are rushed and herded from one place to another.  It will be easier to explore as much of the islands as possible by avoiding holiday season. This is a tropical island and the weather throughout the year is humid and hot. You might get the occasional burst of rain (that last 10 minutes or so) but it is very welcoming to cool off. Only the truly peak monsoon months (read about in in my other posts) will result in flooding and lots of rain. But that is the exception. I have been there in March, April, May and had the most fabulous time. Even September and October are low season but perfect weather most of the time. MUCH CHEAPER TOO.

Book tours, transport or scooters through your hotel or a reputable registered company.

There are many people who will take advantage of tourists, no matter what country you in.  Be safe about choosing a tour and use a reputable company instead of a random guy selling unprofessional trips to unsuspecting tourist, alternatively speak to your hotel.  If you hiring a scooter or vehicle it is best to speak to your hostel or hotel first. (They will always have referrals) or book a driver in advance if you need an airport pick up.  If you hit the streets there are plenty options to hire pretty much any form of transport. (Even a Harley Davidson) However,  hiring transport from road side locals becomes quite risky because they require your passport for security and if something happens you will have to pay some outrages amount of money to get it back. (Read all about how to do this on my other blog posts).

Visiting the temples

Being a prominently Buddhist country, Phuket has quite a few Buddhist Temples which are extraordinary to visit and highly recommend. Being on a tropical island you will probably spend most of the time in bikinis and shorts, however you can’t walk into the temples dressed for the beach.  It is a sign of disrespect to their culture and customs that have been around for centuries. Ladies, it is very humid on the island but always pack a scarf or sarong in you bag to wrap around your legs or shoulders.  Men, make sure you wear a shirt before entering the temples. This is a place of worship for devotees and monks, they gladly welcome visitors but remember to respect their customs.

Food

Thailand is famous for its Thai cuisine and the Thai dishes are fabulous in Phuket.  But you’ll find hordes of international cuisine in Phuket as well, Japanese, Korean, Lebanese, Turkish, Persian, Chinese? you will find more of those restaurants than Thai ones! And of course the Western fast food outlets (if you really have to) are many; KFC, Subway, Pizza Hut, Burger King, McDonalds (unfortunately), Starbucks and many many more. And by the way, the Thai KFC are fabulous!!!!!!! Much better than our local version. 


Please please please ....... do buy your food from the many Food Plazas like Malin Plaza. The food is EXCELLENT and it is cheap. In 9 years I have had not one incident of an upset stomach. If you see a lot of Thais buying from a food vendor be assured that the food is good. Thais are very particular about where they buy food. This was an inside tip from my Thai friends.

The Famous Tourist Traps of Phuket

Yea, these traps are all over the world and Phuket is no exclusion. Trust me on these ones.......

Bangla Road. A definite must on your to do list. But be very alert. If you walk around, you will see clubs and bars open their doors wide, with scantily-clad ladies dancing on table tops and bar counters. If you’re new to this, then it may be an eye-opener for you!

But that’s not all. Walking around, you will also see men and women peddling with menus, inviting you to  FREE “Ping Pong” shows. Ping Pong shows are famous in Thailand only. You can find them in Bangkok too. But they are NEVER FREE and you will walk with open eyes right into their trap. Once you enter those doors you are trapped. 

The show might be free but here is the catch. You are forced to buy drinks, and are not allowed to leave before doing so, unless you want to face a very harsh, loud, in your face argument with the patrons. Here is where the trap comes into place. You order your beer from the menu ..... mostly in Thai writing. Comes the payment therefor .....SHOCK! ...... between 400 to 600 Baht for one beer that cost you 80 baht in a normal bar or 40 Baht at the 7-Eleven!!!! We were caught. Ignorant first time tourists from South Africa wanting to see this eye opening sex show ...... boy oh boy (it was an eye opener yes, but we left there paying almost R 1500 (YES RAND) for three drinks!!!!!! Don't think you can just stand up and walk out. Oh no, those heavy weight bouncers will detain you.

Seen the menu? Yes, those shows are for adults only.

In every show, you will see ladies (or lady-boys) doing amazing tricks and stuns with their private part. You have to see it to believe the amazing things it can do: like lighting a cigarette, shooting an arrow and more.

How much for the show? Look at the menu - ‘Free Show Only Buy Drink’ only.

Here is our personal experience (and other friends after us who also visited out of curiosity). We told the man outside with his advert we are interested, and right away, he led us the way into the club. The place where the real performance took place seems very discreet. We have to walk through a door, through an empty room, and through another door, through an empty room, and a final door again. Big muscles door openers ......

We are not sure why this place is sooooo secretive that we have to walk so deep into the bar just to watch the show. Okay… maybe its an adult show, that’s why.

And finally, we were inside the real bar with the Ping Pong Show. It’s kind of dark (as expected), with a few ladies (or lady-boys) on stage preparing for next show. There were a few other tourists (mainly Russian) around us, probably visitors who are curious just like us.

We took our seats and waited for the next show.

And at this time, a waitress came over to show us the drinks menu.

Remember ‘Free Show Only Buy Drink’? We kind of expected that we have to pay for something. But what happens next SHOCK us.

We looked at the menu. The price list is crazy.

The drinks listed on the menu range from 45 USD to 100 USD. YEST US DOLLAR!!!!

I re-examine the menu. It is 45 USD to 100 USD. Not Thai Baht!?

And guess what is the cheapest drink at 45 USD?......  A glass of coke.

Wow… I didn’t expect I have to pay so much for a drink to watch a show which we’re just curious about.

That price is just too much for us to pay for. We tried to bargain.. “Can both of us share 1 glass of coke?” They said No. Each person has to buy a drink.

At that point, I did my math. I realized it is not worth it to pay so much (US$90 for both of us) for 2 glass of cokes, and girls performing weird tricks with their p****. So after about 7 mins of ‘negotiations’, we told the waitress we are leaving.

At that point of time, another waiter came over to convince us to stay. He even said we can just buy 1 glass of coke. (I thought we can’t earlier?). But we insisted we want to leave. But both of them still tried to hold us back and keep convincing us ‘the show is about to start!’, and he will even give us discounts on the drinks.

We don’t feel comfortable staying any longer and somehow felt that they are trying to prevent us from leaving. Don’t forget, we are tourists, and we just walked through 3 doors to the bar. We are totally unfamiliar with that place!

That was when I stopped talking, and started walking out. The waiter continued to follow us on our way out and hope that we would change our minds and turn back. But after opening 3 doors and walking through 3 rooms, we are out of that bar.

Wow. What an ‘experience’!

Taking a photo with a lady-boy. If you would like take a photo with a lady-boy or with an animal handled by a tout, they will demand money from you afterwards. If you refuse to pay, they may gang up to threaten you. Say “no” firmly and walk away if you are pestered. Although extremely beautiful, lady-boys can get ruthless and will scream on the to of their voices at you if you do not participate. Do you really want attention drawn to you in the middle of a street? Remember lady-boys (they are called the third gender in Thailand) are protected and most of them has "bodyguard" like pimps that will appear from nowhere.

If you find yourself in a challenging situation, call the Patong Tourist Police (1155) for help.

The old “you damaged the jet ski” scam. This is one that pops up all over the place. The tourist (you – in this case) rents a jet ski. After using it, the person or company that you rented it from claims you damaged it and must pay for the repairs. However, there is no damage. This a tourist trap that appears again and again. In order to avoid falling prey to this scam, never use an important document, such as your passport, as collateral. You also should examine the jet ski closely both before and after you ride it. If you see any dents or dings, point them out before you take possession of it. Lastly, don’t be afraid and give in. The person might say that you need to pay up or go to jail, but that really isn’t the case at all. This is a well known scam and every day tourists are caught with it. Just google "jet ski scam Phuket" and see the millions of posts. BE WARNED! The tourist here will always be on the losing side ..... many corrupt police will take the side of the vendor. Remember they think tourists have lots of DOLLARS!!!!!!

But do not be alarmed. Phuket is an awesome place thats why we are there every year. To me it is my home away from home. You are sin another country so abide by their rules.